The Art of Aloneness

My story; history, life after Military service, grief, loss, illness & injury. Mental & physical health journey. Learning to be alone, love again; myself & others. What I’ve learned by being alone, about being alone, while alone.

Everyday Life Now? Or the Second Coming?

Yeats wrote, in his poem, "The Second Coming", “The best lack all conviction, while the worst are full of passionate intensity.”

As I’ve penned, in previous posts here, I’m done with this country. Done with the scourge of humanity. Done with division, hatred, fear mongering and judgement. Done, with people, many of whom I’ve served and protected in some capacity throughout my many years; in various roles, in the helping profession in this area. I’m done with having to always be the voice of reason amongst my friends and family members, who for some reason, buy into one or the other’s ‘side’ of the ceaseless ongoing arguments occurring within society at the minute. Useless and pointless arguments that have been happening for well over a year and a half now; with no end in sight, and with no ‘winners’ to be had. There are no ‘winners’. No one wins, if society continues to be divided in this manner. The only way humanity wins this race; survives this pandemic and dis-eased existential crisis we’ve found ourselves in of late, is if we unite. But it’s not our nature to do so, is it?

Conflict and division has always existed within our ‘civilized’ world. That’s why they call it the ‘human race’, isn’t it? A race, against one another; with no winners? One with no finish line. Because wherever there is dis-ease, there is fear. And, where there is fear, there is division and hate. And where there is division and hate, there is further dis-ease. Of the body, the mind, the spirit, and within society; within humanity. The real threat this past year and a half hasn’t really been the virus, itself. It’s our reaction to it; and to all of the ensuing trauma and drama it’s caused. And, as I’ve said before, in previous blogs, I use the term, “reaction”, versus, “response”, for a reason.

Response, means an answer; in certain cases, a solution. Whereas, a reaction is an action or feeling experienced, and action taken in response to a situation or event. An action, based on a feeling. I know I’m oversimplifying the difference between the two but it’s to highlight the differences in how people are affected by certain events and situations. How, some react; because of how they feel about these experiences. And, some respond; because they can problem solve and try to find a solution. Or, at the very least, see the big picture and look past how it affects them, and their lives. Those who respond, do so in a selfless and more globally minded way; thinking about how others will feel/react/respond, and how it will affect them, as well as others. They’re not caught up in themselves and their own safety/needs/desires, etc. as much as those who ‘react’ seemingly are.

Those who’ve ‘responded’ throughout all of this, like me, are exhausted though. Physically, psychologically, emotionally, spiritually and existentially. Exhausted. Completely and utterly exhausted. Because of those who have reacted. Those who have selfishly battled one another, and the ‘responders’; for the sake of argument.

As Yeats says, “The best lack all conviction, while the worst are full of passionate intensity”. And, while I don’t know that Yeats was referring to such things as a global pandemic, and humanity’s reaction/response to it, it perfectly describes how I see what’s been happening to people, this past year and a half. The best; the responders (regardless of what their stance is), have lost their conviction. They’re done in. They’re tired of fighting the good fight. While, the worst; the re-actors (regardless of what ‘side’ they are on), are full of passionate intensity. They live to fight; but not to live, apparently. While they’re busy, in their own self-righteousness, battling it out with others, they don’t see how greatly they’re dehumanizing those they’re battling with. Or, if they do, they don’t care. And, what they are also failing to see, is that while they are dehumanizing those with whom they disagree, they are in all actuality, becoming the very thing they are criticizing. They are becoming the very thing that they say they won’t tolerate. They are becoming their own version of their own worst enemy. The very thing they say they despise.

And, throughout this ‘war’ between these two sides, that they’ve divided into, throughout this dis-ease, they’ve, “loosed” the, “blood-dimmed tide”, and now, “everywhere the ceremony of innocence is drowned”, as Yeats would say. Ironically, they don’t see that, while trying to fight the ‘monster’ this past year and a half, they’ve become the ‘monster’, themselves; killing the innocence that once existed in them, and in others. They have become the very thing that they see as the threat. And, the irony of it all, is just too damn loud for me.

But apparently, they don’t see it! The same people who were once fighting for small businesses, are now boycotting them because of new provincial mandates, disallowing unvaccinated people from attending and partaking in certain social events and venues because of the fourth wave. The same people that have consistently engaged in expressing the, “we’re all in this together”, narrative throughout this, are now dehumanizing the unvaccinated population. Calling them, “anti-vaxxers”, and spewing violent, harmful and denigrating rhetoric their way. The same people insisting on patience, compassion, kindness and empathy, are now being impatient, cruel, unkind and callous to those who don’t share their views, beliefs or ideals. Our population has become callous, apathetic and ruthless. There has to be some kind of solution for all of this. A solution, or at the very least, respite from all of the darkness this dis-ease has caused within society; within individuals, and communities, alike.

I know a lot of it is ‘survivalist’ mentality but there has to be a reason, or some kind of positive outcome after all is said and done. Otherwise, as I’ve said so many times before, what the hell are we surviving for? To once again, quote Yeats, “Surely, some revelation is at hand; surely, the second coming is at hand” … either that, or a serious ‘reboot’ of some kind? And, I’m not talking about the conspiracy theory of ‘the great reset’ so many have written, blogged or share on social media about. I mean, a reboot of humanity’s values, ideals, morality, existentialism. Something that will make this great divide and this, as Yeats calls it, “rough beast”, that society has become, all worth the pain and suffering. Worth the cold, hard reality in which we’ve all been living this past year and a half. There has to be some kind of change of mindset with regard to our lives, love, compassion, empathy and kindness. Or, at the very least, we need to see a unifying force, somewhere in the world, throughout all of this. Otherwise, the real virus was us, all along.

If this is everyday life now, and not the second coming, please stop the world; I want off.