“The greatest risk most of us will take in our lifetime is that of repression or denial of basic rights of another person. The great risk is that you have no idea what will happen if that person you think so small or insignificant of stands up and totally eclipses the Sun in the universe of those lacking in empathy, humility, and humbleness.” ― Donavan Nelson Butler, Master Sergeant US Army
'Op Honour', who?
Over the past several weeks, I’ve been watching the military leadership structure crumble, by no-one’s fault but their own. I’ve watched both, the former Chief of Defence Staff (CDS) and current, serving CDS, being investigated for sexual misconduct. The former CDS, the one responsible for implementing ‘Op Honour’, that was implemented as a way of ridding the military of sexual misconduct back in 2015; while he was being investigated for sexual misconduct, himself. Protocols that he put in place, as a knee-jerk reaction to an exhaustive investigation and ensuing report on military sexual misconduct, by former supreme court judge, Marie Deschamps (who interviewed me, personally, as well), but that considering the allegations against him, at the time, he didn’t truly get behind. And, yet he played an instrumental role in the creation and implementation of this set of protocols. Protocols that were, supposed to be, in part a way of allowing victims to safely come forward without fear of reprisal. To report sexual misconduct that they had experienced, and be taken seriously. Protocols that were meant to make the work environment less harmful and toxic, and protect others from the same kind of victimization. Protocols that were supposed to protect members from experiencing both, sexual misconduct, and abuse of authority. Protocols that he clearly didn’t take seriously himself; if he is guilty of the allegations against him, that is. And, the very same protocols that I put my trust in when I reported the sexual misconduct and abuse of authority that I had been subjected to. And yet, that didn’t protect me, in the slightest.
Yesterday, the Conservative Party of Canada brought to light allegations of ‘abuse of authority’, after the witness who brought forth the allegations against the current CDS, was threatened anonymously. Threatened that he would lose his job if he went forward with standing up against the CDS’ alleged heinous criminal behaviour. The Conservative Party, trying to suggest that the Liberal party had something to do with these threats. Making it, as always, a political issue; versus focusing on the harm done to all of the victims of military sexual misconduct throughout the past several decades. And, by doing so, diminishing their experiences, the associated traumas, and not focusing on all of the other abuse of authority that occurred, or careers lost, as a result of them reporting these crimes. Focusing on politics, versus solutions to the real problem at hand; the patriarchal, misogynistic, overly sexualized, highly toxic and abusive work environment that every soldier either contributes to or falls prey or victim to while serving in the military.
Then, I saw an article, that Canada would be getting its first female Vice-Chief of Defence Staff (VCDS), Lt-Gen Frances J Allen, as the article stated, “after military shake-up”. Now, don’t get me wrong, as a strong female, myself I’m always happy to see other strong females in leadership positions. And, I’m ecstatic for this woman and what it means for her career. However, I have to wonder how much of this is yet another knee jerk reaction to these investigations? How much of her posting is the result of the military thinking that, by putting a female in this level of leadership, that this will finally rid the military of sexual misconduct? I hope I’m wrong, but I don’t think that this is what needs to happen to rid the military of this toxic environment, at all. And, I hope she feels the same way or it’s just another token move on the military’s part; like Op Honour (commonly referred to as “Hop on Her” by remaining misogynistic soldiers and their Chain of Command, after its implementation).
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t know Ms. Allen so, I cannot speak to her qualifications or intentions in this regard, but I can speak for myself and countless other female soldiers and veterans who have had female leaders. Some of whom were quite empowering and helped many of us, in many ways, throughout our careers. Others, like the female captain that caused my near suicide attempt throughout my sexual harassment reporting process (wrt the male Sgt in my chain of command who subjected me to years of sexual harassment and abuse of authority), were worse than some of the men in the same positions. This particular female captain, one of the worst I’ve met. Not only did she not believe me, she went out of her way to make my life miserable and tried to get rid of me; and eventually succeeded because I didn’t have the strength to fight her. Which was I’m sure, what she was counting on when she launched her attack on me for having reported one of our own.
She didn’t take my report seriously. Neither the she nor the CO of our Regiment did, in fact. Nor did they move the Sgt, in question. I had to work with him every single day, until they eventually moved me. But not before making sure to tell me that she was moving me because the Sgt was, “more valuable” than I was; because he was a higher rank. Prior to my temporary posting, I ended up on stress leave, as a result. While I was on leave, no-one looked in on me. Meanwhile, she was looking into my medical file, my personnel file, and dismantling my job so that she could give it away to others, and relieve me of my duties. She tried multiple times to find reasons to have me charged; once, for AWOL, because she thought that I was late arriving for duty, but I’d used my entrance code to enter by the back door of the detachment so, she couldn’t proceed with charges. Otherwise, I’m certain she would have launched a full-on investigation. Another time, she tried to have me charged with being out of uniform; but I had a chit to wear civilian clothing so, she couldn’t. I had to request my entire personnel file, just to prove that I’d never had any charges or administrative action taken against me. On the contrary, in fact, I’d been given a commendation by the Brigade Commander only short months before.
I don’t know if she saw me as another strong female, who was a potential threat; like a bug that needed to be squashed. Or, if she was friends with the Sgt in question, and felt retribution was an appropriate response to my complaint against him. All I know is that my greatest fear about coming forward, and what prevented me from doing so for so many years before, is exactly what came to pass when I did finally report the sexual misconduct and abuse of authority that I’d been victim of. And, was subjected to further abuse of authority; at the hands of a fellow-female soldier, as a result. And, on my final day in the military, no-one came to see me off. In fact, I handed in my badge and ID to a clerk at the base headquarters, and later learned, when I requested my badge be put in a shadow box by the military police association, that my badge had been lost. They apparently lodged a complaint about this, and there was allegedly and investigation but I never heard back about it. But a lost Military Police badge isn’t something to take lightly. And yet, nothing was done. Which begs the question as to what really happened to it? The clerk returned it to the detachment, in person. So, who took it? The captain in question? The Sgt? That would-be retribution at its finest. The blood sweat and tears and sacrifices I made for that badge were all for naught, if so.
Either way, the whole thing was a nightmare. And just like far too many others like me, Op Honour didn’t protect me one iota. I only came forward because I thought the CDS had my back. Turns out, if the allegations against him are true; both recent ones and those he was being investigated for in 2015 (while he was creating and implementing Op Honour), he was no better than the Sgt, in question. And his newly formed, “Operation Honour” protocols and procedures. Protocols that he put in place to combat military sexual misconduct and abuse of authority, were no more than a career-enhancing, political power play on his part. Or a feigned attempt at showing he cared – but was really just covering his proverbial ass. He didn’t care. He didn’t have our backs. And his ‘Operation’ didn’t work.
On the contrary, all it did was give far too many of us a false sense of safety and security. It saw far too many victims come forward with these reports before the military was in a position to deal with them effectively. Even the CF National Investigative Service (CFNIS); the Military Police’s major crimes unit, wasn’t prepared for, or effective in dealing with these investigations. Especially not those involving their own; like mine. In fact, I was not only not believed by them, as well, but was interrogated by one of my own. I called him out on it, and told him I’d just finished the same training that he had and knew what he was doing and yet, he continued doing it. And, after I requested a copy of the investigation, I learned that the same (lead) investigator had led the investigation; speaking to someone prior to speaking to me, the victim. Asking leading questions to all witnesses, that painted me as a trouble maker, and suggesting that I was trying to, “get the Sgt in trouble because I was mad at him [for something]”, etc.
And then, despite a completely botched investigation, the unit (also Military Police), eventually led their own administrative investigation. And, found him guilty. They, gave him some kind of punishment. But because it wasn’t criminal, I never found out the result of which. I did however, find out that he was promoted. Thanks to the female captain and her support of him. Meanwhile, I was so re-traumatized and let down that I almost took my own life, again. So no, I don’t think that simply putting a female in the role of VCDS, or even CDS will solve this problem in the military. In fact, it could make it worse. And, I don’t know Ms. Allen so, I may be completely off base with that assumption; she might just be the very person/woman who finally fixes this systemic problem once and for all. I’m hopeful that this is the case, but I don’t think it’s that simple. And, she could very well be the same kind of leader as this female captain I dealt with; one of the most toxic, narcissistic, misogynistic females I’ve ever dealt with. And, I have dealt with far too many to name – one being the executive director of a women’s shelter for abuse victims, that I worked for, as well. You can see the irony there, right? But as I said, I don’t know Ms. Allen. Nor do I know anything of her personality, her heart, her convictions, or even of her career so, I cannot speculate on how she will handle things. But, I am hoping with all my might that she proves me wrong.
In the meantime, I’m absolutely certain that we have not seen or heard the last of the senior leaders to be investigated for sexual misconduct. It was a well-known fact that our very own Provost Marshall had at least one inappropriate sexual relationship with a subordinate throughout his time in the Military Police. Among others; including more than one of the Sgt’s at the detachment where I, myself fell victim to one of them.
The ridiculous thing about this is, that we know it happens; we’ve known since the 90’s when Macleans wrote an article about the very same thing. And yet, we’ve done little to nothing about it since. It’s cost people their mental health, wellness and some, their lives, And, it’s cost Canadian tax payers billions of dollars; in investigations, in protocol creation and implementation, and in reparations to victims – most of which we’ve not yet seen, and yet have been forced, “prove [we] deserve”, by being forced to tell our story over and over again and be re-traumatized over and over again for. Despite the fact that the federal government agreed to these reparations through arbitration, resulting from a class action suit against them. And, despite that we were promised reconciliation and reparations… but that’s another blog post.
No, we’ve not seen the last of these behaviours, at all. On the contrary, this is just the beginning. Not because it’s finally being handled properly; it’s not. Not because the military or the Canadian government care about us victims and survivors; they don’t. And, certainly not because we put a token female in a position of leadership; hopefully I’m wrong. But, because the media has got a hold of this story. And, as a result, survivors like me and so many others are getting louder. And louder, and louder by the minute. Because this has been going on since the beginning of time; and has been a major systemic problem in our military since even before women joined the ranks. It’s not just women, you know. There are so many men, also adversely affected by this toxic environment, as well. You think women underreport sexual misconduct? You’ve got no idea how many men there are with similar stories. But again, that’s another blog post for later.
With each perpetrator they take down, and each story that comes to light, as a result, the more believed we will be. The more we are believed – FINALLY – the more we will raise our voices for change. And, we will continue to do so as long as we have breath. Because it needs to stop. And, those who have perpetrated these crimes, supported the perpetrators, and/or allowed for the continuance of their behaviour in anyway need to be treated as the criminals, for once. They are the ones that should be shamed, and ousted and suffer reprisal. Instead of the people they victimized. The perpetrators are the ones who need to be punished. Not, the victims. "Op Honour" needs to live up to it's name; to put "honour" back into the military ethos, and to "honour" those who truly deserved to be "honoured". Not just those who demand they be.