Authentically You
The buzzword of the past few years or so has been ‘authentic’. The buzz phrase; ‘live your best life’. Be authentic, live your best life! How the hell are we supposed to do that if we don’t know who we are or what we want? How are we supposed to do that if we haven’t taken the time to get to know what ‘authentic’ looks like for us, or what we need to do/have/be to ‘live our best lives’? If we want to be ‘authentic’, we first need to spend some time alone, in quiet contemplation or prayer and have conversations with ourselves; to speak to ourselves, and get to know who this person is that resides within us. We need to look inside ourselves; deep inside our psyches and learn what makes us uniquely us.
We need to learn more about what we value, what we love, desire and need to be our best selves. We need to look inside for these answers, not at the world around us. We need to stop looking at the inspirational memes; hoping that one of them will magically change our lives, put down the phone and learn to communicate again, starting with ourselves. Speak to ourselves and ask them what they want. Spend time with ourselves and figure out who we are; then figure out what an ‘authentic’ version of this person we see, is.
We need to learn what our values truly are, and why. What our beliefs are, and why. How we communicate; with ourselves and with others, and why. How we perceive life and the world around us, and why. Learn what authentic actually looks like to and for each of us, in relationships; starting with the relationship with ourselves, and in work, play and life, in general. To figure out our own worth and what that looks like to living our ‘best lives’. How we can truly accomplish this, and know what it will look like, when we do, if we don't know who it is we are doing it for; us?
The issue is, the word ‘authentic’ is being thrown around loosely these days. Life coaches and influencers post memes telling you to be your true and authentic selves; as though it’s just that easy. As though you know yourself enough to know who that is. As though, everyone can have a better life by simply being, ‘authentic’. The problem with this, is that they aren’t telling you how. They’re saying, “live your best life”, and, “be authentically you”. But they don’t say, “do it like this”, because they don’t all know how. If they did, would they not be telling you to “do it this way”, instead of just throwing words and phrases, like ‘authenticity’ and ‘best life’ around like fodder? If they tell you to be authentic without telling you how to achieve that, then they are failing you and are just as uncertain how to do so as their target audience is. Or, if they have a ‘recipe’ to help you ‘be authentic’ or ‘live your best life’, as opposed to a way of leading you to your own truth; if they tell you to ‘do these things’ to be ‘you’, they’re actually telling you to be like them, instead of you; hence, to be more like their ‘authentic selves’, than being your own authentic self.
Being authentic doesn’t involve doing what someone else tells you to do. On the contrary; it involves you figuring out who you are, by getting to know yourself. By taking a real and honest look at yourself and who you are. Looking at yourself honestly, allows you to see the true you. The real, authentic you. Your own uniqueness and your unique gifts. Your true path and your real desires. Knowing yourself allows you to be authentic. Being authentic, allows you to take up the space that you were given by the universe by being the you, you really truly are. Instead of being what others want you to be. Instead of doing what others want you to do. It allows you to be different from others. Being different from others is crucial to being authentic, because you are not them, you are you. In order to be your ‘authentic self’ and ‘live your best life’, you need to take some time to be alone; like I’ve said before, spend time getting to know yourself the way you would, another. Take time to get to know and love the person you are; by turning your focus around to you for a while. By taking a real and honest look in the mirror at who and what you really are; see what makes you uniquely you.
Spend time with you and learn to love yourself. Spend time with you, date you, fall in love with you, and learn to be this authentically you version of you, that you’ve come to know, by being honest about who you really are and what you really want. When you know this person, and love this person, it’s easy to ‘live your best life’; because when you’re honest, you live honestly. Living your best life only means, living honestly and true to your authentic self.