Telling Stories
“Storytelling has earned its place as the most important tradition humans possess. The most important reason for this being that every story contains a lesson to instruct the audience. Stories teach us to love, to forgive others, to be just and to strive for better than we have.” – Excerpt from, “The Importance of Story Telling”, by an essay contest winner from Home Schooling Advocates online contest
I’ve been watching “13 Reasons Why” this past week or so, and came to a few realizations while doing so (other than the fact, that this show can be exceptionally triggering and shouldn’t be watched if you’re not in a good place) one, being; that this is why I write. I write, as a way of expressing what’s inside me; as an exercise in catharsis. I write as a way of reaching out to and hopefully, reaching others going through similar things, sharing similar circumstances, as myself. I write as a way of educating those who aren’t; those who wouldn’t otherwise understand what it’s like to struggle in such a way but need to know to either, prevent it from happening to them or someone else, or to help others who have struggled in this way.
I write to tell a story. One of loneliness turned, aloneness; isolation turned, solitude. One of negative and harmful self-talk turned, contemplation and prayer. I’m writing the book of me, to connect with others who are doing the same, and those who aren’t but maybe, should. I’m write to illuminate my path and possibly connect with and illuminate someone else’s, as well. I write to tell my story in hopes that others will follow suit and tell theirs, as well. Because it is through telling our stories, that we find empathy, compassion and forgiveness to help us heal.
The other realization being, that now seems to be the best time for all of us to tell our stories. It’s a time, where people are becoming aware and are more and more open to hearing these stories, sharing their own and helping to effect change in our society. A time, when we have all strayed so far from ourselves and what life is truly supposed to be about; magnanimous service to others and helping those less fortunate than us.
This broken world has caused us to stray from this path. It’s caused us to look for things that fill the deep void we all seem to have within us; a void that straying from this path has caused. That's caused enormous amounts of hurt and pain to our world and to us. We have seen too much pain and broken the links in the metaphorical chain that once connected us all together. By doing this, we’ve strayed from one another and both, hurt others in doing so, and hurt ourselves by being away from those connections. When we aren’t connected with others, we are in chaos; we are isolated, instead of in solitude and thought/prayer/contemplation.
Telling our stories seems to be a way of reaching out to one another again; reaching out a hand to another to either hold and say, “You’re not alone”, or to have them hold ours and say the same. Of trying to connect again, to both heal ourselves, through telling these stories; through catharsis, and by showing empathy to ourselves, and for others going through the same thing. Of trying to reconnect to help heal the world around us, as well as ourselves.
We have strayed so far from our paths; from the right path, that we have to put our hands together now through these stories and this pain. To right the wrongs that have been done to us but also to right the wrongs done to others; and to the world, as a whole. In a world, where we have instant access to literally anyone on the planet; in any country and at any time, through social media and other forms of immediate and instant communication, we are more disconnected than we have ever been from one another. Separated from each other and disconnected from ourselves, our true path, and others.
Ironically, the longer I spent alone, in quiet contemplation, the more I realized how isolated we all are, as a whole. Some of us have friends and other connections, some of us have tribes; some positive and true that are good for us and others, not as much so. But all of us are somehow and for some reason, still disconnected from our true community. What community was meant to be, in the first place; fellowship. We’ve lost that fellowship, and the sharing that was meant to exist in our communities. And, the further away we stray from this path, and from each other, the harder things get for us. The more damage is done to us.
We cannot live in a bubble. Living alone, and spending time in solitude and contemplation/prayer/thought is good for us but we still need one another. We still need friendship, fellowship, camaraderie and connections and, we still need community. By sharing our stories, and telling others of our struggles, we are doing this. We are finding others who can relate to what we, ourselves have gone through and some of them are reaching a hand out to us, as we are reaching out a hand to them. We are connecting; through sharing commonalities with others, which is, in fact, the very definition of community.
When we spend time alone, we need to ask ourselves, is it in isolation or solitude. Are we spending time in thought/contemplation/prayer, or are we isolating ourselves? If we are isolating, why are we? We need to recognize the difference. We also need to recognize the difference between being with a partner, friends or family who are toxic to us, just so that we aren’t alone; versus being with those with whom we feel that sense of fellowship that defines community, and makes up a true tribe where there is real and true connection.
Choosing negative influences, false friends or idols in our lives will ultimately make us more alone, in the end. When we choose unhealthy and toxic relationships and activities in order to avoid being alone, it often becomes what causes us to inevitably isolate ourselves, in this way; what, inevitably makes us lonely. Like I’ve said before, I learned all of this by spending time alone, first in isolation and then eventually, in solitude and thought/prayer/contemplation. Being alone, rightly, helped me find true fellowship and camaraderie, and helped me find my true tribe. And, ironically, it helped me see how important it was to reach out; the importance of connection, community and fellowship. And, taught me, the importance of telling our stories.
Everyone has a story to tell. Some, a story of survival, some of letting go. Others, a story of times when they had to give something up that they weren't ready to give up. And all have a story of difficulties that they've been through. Everyone's got some kind of story about not making it or not having it or not being able to keep it. And, everyone also has a story about when they did make it, when they did rise above and when they defeated something that helped them keep whatever, “it”, was that they wanted to keep.
Some tell their stories in a narrative, like my posts, or like televisions shows like, “13 Reasons Why”. Some tell them through humorous books, blogs and movies or television shows. Some tell their stories through music, and others, through visual or dramatic arts. All, of equal importance. All, hoping to reach someone. Most, hoping to help someone; through their stories. All, tell stories that someone can relate to; whether fiction or non-fiction truths.
Stories of love and loss; of pain and sorrow. Stories of losing everything, and stories of overcoming obstacles and rising above. All stories create and restore the fellowship that is needed within our communities. All stories are important. All stories reach someone. All stories connect us. All stories deserve to be told.
Everyone has a story to tell. What's yours? Tell it.